I remember a wonderful..zany neighbor..Joan!

By far and away the craziest and best neighbor I ever had was a woman named Joanne who was referred to by her 80 plus year old mother as Joan-nee. I seriously think I could write a TV comedy show about her.

Joan was different; she had a sick nervous cough, crunched continually on ice, and had an interest in coupons.  As a matter of fact I labeled her a “Coup-a-holic”.  She worked a full time job,  clipping coupons, free offers and refunds in her spare time.  One room in her house was devoted to this hobby and I would help her. 

Sometimes she would arrange coupon rides where a group of us would take the family’s motorhome to the grocery store and go shopping.  Grandma and Joan however would lag behind having to cross every aisle while diligently souring her coupons.  We on the other hand would retreat to the motorhome to play music, sip beer, and eat popcorn while waiting. I thought it was a wonderful way to shop.

One night I took Joan and grandma to the Williams Store in North Syracuse, which at that time was the largest store in the area.  I purchased what I needed and then I sat outside waiting and waiting for them to come out.  Finally the lights went out.  I was mystified. Had I missed something?  It seems I hadn’t, Joan and grandma were in the back of the store and missed to closing announcements so when the lights went out they got locked in - in the complete dark.  Luckily the store had security lasers that went off and a short time later they were escorted out of the store…but alas, with no groceries.

Joan also had great credit and had purchased their house on a credit card from the church up the street.  The rectory was being changed and Joan bought it and had it moved next to her mother’s, which is how she ended up next to me!

The company Joan worked for was a credit and collection company that went through workers continually.  Joan had worked there for years and explained that she felt sorry for people and would try to help them with their problems encouraging them to pay her something, calling them back to talk to them about problems…a kind person who was stuck in a horrible job.  Joan claimed the only way she could keep doing it was because she could listen to country music to calm her. Country music that was banned from her workplace I might add.

So to get around this music ban she had a transistor radio strapped to her leg or where -ever and an earphone that was in one ear hidden by her long hair.  I remember many a morning when she would run over to my house so I could tape the wire to her with flesh colored tape so no one would see it through her cloths.

One morning she broke her short ear wire and had to tape a 25 foot long one to her, so she tucked the cord in her underwear.  Grandma had gone to breakfast with her at the dinner next to where she worked and noticed that after Joan came out of the ladies room she was dragging a tail.  That tail turned out to be the cord.  Then that very week she was informed that the big boss was coming to town and wanted to speak to her…she was sure she was going to be fired…. found-out because of the wire!

A gem of humor, Back Roads Bernie!

Bernie moved to Eaton after his mother’s death, and Bernie became another experience.  As a matter of fact there are so many stories about Bernie and when he grew up in Eaton that they could fill a book on their own.  Bernie had a metal plate in his head and had an arm that had been deformed because of an injury. These injuries were caused by one of Bernie’s wild escapades as a boy. But his disabilities never held him down...in his day he soldered intricate silver scrolling on Oneida Silversmith pieces.

In the days of Bernie’s youth, Walt, his father, and many of the men in town worked for the Milk Plant up on one of the hills overlooking the village.  The hill, even to this day, is one of the steepest hills, with an unbelievably steep drop into town.  The Eaton Train Station was located on it, and when the first trains came to Eaton Village, it was said that they had made the longest steepest sustained grade ever built east of the Rocky Mountains.  The town’s parents forbade the children to ride their bikes down the hill, but, of course, that would not stop Bernie.

On this particular morning the boys set out with the lunch pails for the milk station as usual, but after delivering their cargo Bernie decided to take the breath-taking daredevil ride to town.  The boys gasped as they watch Bernie go swooshing down the hill.  Just then a car crossed the intersection at the foot of the hill, and Bernie slammed into it.  The terror that gripped the boys made them slip off and watch the goings on from the safety of some bushes.  The tears flowed and their little bodies shook as after a while, Bernie’s motionless body was put into a hearse that sped away.

I met one of the boys, now an elderly man, one day when I was working in town, and he said he had run home and hid in his bedroom.  He was terrified that his mother would find out he was with Bernie, and he knew for sure it would get him into trouble. He thought that the overwhelming sadness and shock of losing his good friend was too much for his young heart to take.

The story behind the story was that the town’s undertaker was playing cards in the gas station, once a pleasant pastime in that era.  The gas station was at the foot of the hill where the accident took place, and the men, seeing the horrible accident, removed a body from the hearse which the undertaker had parked to play cards, locked the body in the gas station bay, put Bernie into the hearse and beat a fast track to the Utica Hospital, a ride that saved Bernie’s life.

Another time Bernie and one of his friends crawled through the window of the old furniture shop on River Road that made coffins for the Madison County Poor House, which was located a short distance away.  They stole one of the coffin bottoms and took it for a ride on the old pond out behind the buildings, enjoying a sail and playing pirates! 

The stories go on forever, and one I can contribute myself.  When Bernie became ill and couldn’t drive, I would volunteer to take him to the doctor in Oneida. Nick-named “Back Roads Bernie” for a reason, he would make me take this road or that so he could show me this person’s farm, or where he did this or that, basically filling me in with history tidbits, I guess.  On the way back, he would ask me to stop at the Munnsville Legion.  Since his  appointments were early in the morning, our stop at the Legion would be at about 9:30 am.  This tradition of course was not unusual for a farm area, but was for most people like myself.  He would say, “This is Back Street Mary, the writer”, everyone would nod and tell me some history tidbit, I would have a beer on Bernie, and then everyone would buy me a beer, which I didn’t drink, so I was given wooden beer chips to use in the future.

One time I could not take Bernie to Oneida and asked my housemate Chris to do it.   She agreed to do it and asked Bernie what time she should pick him up.   Chris didn’t know better and so took him straight to Oneida.  He looked at her and said, “how come we’re so early; my appointment isn’t for another 45 minutes?” 

Later that night I saw Chris.  She told me what happened and asked if he had ever asked me to stop for a beer at 9 in the morning.  I replied “yes”.  I opened the drawer under the kitchen counter revealing a large number of wooden beer chips and said, “Where do you think all of these came from?”

For the Bicentennial of the Hamlet of Eaton I invited the Town Supervisor and the Board members back to my house, which was referred to by the locals as the “Back Street Bar”, for refreshments. Included in the invitation were members of the Bicentennial Committee, which included Bernie and his wife Betty.  I can still picture old Bern sitting on the stool next to the town’s supervisor telling his whole repertoire of Polish jokes.  The dignitaries were sort of embarrassed, fearing the repercussions of this type of humor. I pointed that out to Bernie, and he blurted out, “Why, I’m Polish!”  He was, and we all laughed, me thinking, boy Bernie, you really are!!

Bernie was loved by all and regardless of what was wrong...he made me laugh!

         

Introduction of Blog

This blog is designed to show you that people are GOLD, that individuals have made differences that cannot be believed, and that sometimes having a few good friends is enough to overcome a hopeless situation....inspire your life....make you smile....or to help you when you are down!

Over the years I have tried some interesting things and each time there have been people around me to help me accomplish them..some supported my efforts...some wished me well and encouraged me...some helped me do things that I never thought possible....some just made me laugh..this blog will tell their stories.

So watch this blog site and be prepared to smile...